I bought my zentai, thinking I’ll have to keep it as my little secret, but it has proved to be one of the best investments I ever made. It really did surprise me when charlotte said she wanted to wear it to a party on Saturday night, up in Manchester; what surprised me even more is she actually went through with it. She actually wore the damn thing in public, something I am yet to do.

What is yet more amusing is the club offered her a job as a podium dancer, and asked her to bring the suit. Now charlotte plans to buy one of her own, in pink.

I think I’ve started something.