Crossrail should have an opening ceremony

There’s no denying the country is currently utterly divided, possibly more divided politically than it ever has been. Brexit has torn us in two, and, despite Corbyn’s laughable attempts to straddle the fence, I don’t see the country coming back together anytime soon.  Now, this might be a silly idea, but it seems to me that what we could do with now is a great big party. Think back to 2012, when the country was all cheerfully united behind London  (the Lib Dems recently invoked the same  idea in a recent ad). I wish we could get some of that united feeling  back. As much as I despise Brexit, this current widespread hostility isn’t good for anyone.

What we all need, then, is a great big party. I  think this is what the tories were getting at with there widely-ridiculed ‘Festival of Britain’ idea. But cruising around a rainy Woolwich yesterday,  I had an idea: what if Crossrail had an opening ceremony? We’ve all been waiting ages for this new zarking tube line, so we might as well have a party when it finally opens. Why not? It could be a big,  grand affair; and since one of it’s main termini will be up in stratford, why not put the show on in the olympic stadium.

The only question is, what would be in the show and who would direct it? I recon it should be on similar lines to the 2012 opening ceremony, although, given old Liz would be at least eight years older by the time Crossrail opens, and 007 will probably have another actor playing him, reusing this film might seem a little dated. Even so,  just think what could be in it   and what a party could be thrown. I definitely think it should include at least one rendition of this song. The  only thing is, it would have to steer clear of politics: if it appeared to  celebrate Remain or Leave, it would only deepen already dangerously deep divisions. Better just celebrate trains, tunnels, and stuff we all agree about.

3 thoughts on “Crossrail should have an opening ceremony

  1. Yes. Thats just what we need to bring the country back together. Lets celebrate the opening of a London tube line. A line that will benefit London and no fucker else. Us Northerners will flock to London to celebrate such a momentous occasion. I can hear Freddie Mercury crawling out of his grave getting ready to smash out a rendition of We Will Rock You to the cheering crowds. I can see people crying in the streets and wailing with joy “thank you cross rail! You’ve knocked 10 minutes off my commute!”.


      1. Absolutely. People from Middlesbrough will rejoice when they hear that Crossrail allows Gideon time to have a flat white before jumping on his train to the City.


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