I know I have only myself to blame for this, but a few months ago I asked my Australian friend Darryl to help me upload all the archived entries from my old blog to my new one. It annoyed me to have almost twenty years of writing no longer online. I didn’t know how to do it but Darryl did. Fool that I am, though, I sent him a pdf file rather than the html file I had, so none of the entries Darryl so kindly uploaded had any of their original links. This has recently started to annoy me, and I’ve been spending quite a bit of time trying to restore the links entry by entry (checking that they still actually lead somewhere first). The problem is, there are probably about two or three thousand entries, so it will take me an absolute age. If anyone reading this can think of a solution, I would be eager to hear it.

I was just browsing Facebook when I came across some news which made my jaw drop: Ben Elton has recently been hinting that we could see the return of Blackadder. When I read that headline, I was stunned. The final scene of Blackadder the Fourth is one of the most famous and moving in British comedy history – how could those characters be brought back, particularly after such a long time? But of course, reading a bit more, you learn that Elton is talking about doing a stage show rather than fifth TV program, rather like how John Cleese adapted Fawlty Towers for the stage. To be honest that makes much more sense, and I think such a show could work well, although it would be very strange indeed to see the great Blackadder being played by anyone other than Rowan Atkinson, or someone other than Sir Tony Robinson playing Baldrick.

Not that this will particularly interest anyone expect perhaps for my immediate family, but today I came across a little path with a very familiar name. I was out on my trundle in Woolwich, exploring back streets I had never been down, when suddenly to my right I caught sight of a narrow footpath called Swettenham Walk. I realise that that won’t mean much to most people reading this, but Swettenham is the name of a tiny little village up in Cheshire, just to the north of Congleton, where I grew up.  It’s barely more than a few houses, a church and a lovely old pub where I first worked out that ordering beer wouldn’t be such a problem after all. To suddenly come across it’s name amid the sprawling metropolis came as such a surprise that I instantly thought it worth noting here. I mean, hardly anyone has heard of Swettenham, so I’m very curious how  that little path got it’s name especially given, if memory serves, there’s also a Congleton Grove somewhere in that area too?

ADDENDUM: you can see the walk here, if you’re interested.

Breakfast today was a bit of an ordeal – things often are when I need to go somewhere new – but things ultimately ended well. I think I’ve mentioned here before that I currently don’t have a PA on Wednesday mornings, so I have to get myself dressed and breakfasted. It isn’t such a big deal: after a few minutes of struggling to get my shoes and socks on, I usually just pop to a local coffee shop.

Until recently, I used to go to costa up in Eltham. A couple of weeks ago, though, I was there with John when, towards the end of our visit, one of the staff members pulled him aside and told him that they didn’t like me coming there alone because of the way I sometimes choked slightly on my food. The way in which the lady spoke to John rather than directly to me, together with the implication that I am too messy or repugnant to not have someone looking after me, pissed me off to be honest, and I resolved not to go there again.

Fortunately this morning I remembered there is a Starbucks in Kidbrooke, just a few minutes’ trundle from my flat, so I set off there instead. Kidbrooke is one of those newly gentrified, stylish areas which seem to be springing up all over London. I had never been there before, but there was always the alternative of just buying some doughnuts from the Sainsbury’s next door. Going in, I felt strangely apprehensive and a little self-conscious: getting people whom I’ve never met before to understand what I need and want can be a bit difficult; even getting them to twig that I communicate by typing into my Ipad can take a few minutes. Today, though, hungry as I was, I persevered, selecting the toastie I wanted for breakfast and giving it to the guy at the check-out. I thought it was important that I didn’t make a mess or anything, and to give the right impression, given that I would probably want to go back there.

It was only after I’d found a table and got out of my powerchair that I started to relax a bit. The only problem was, when it came, the toastie was baking hot, dripping in melted cheese, and not easy for me to pick up: I could see it going everywhere, and getting a repeat of what happened in Costa. Whenever I need to feed myself in public I start to feel self-conscious, as though everyone is looking at me like some disgusting monster.

Today, however, that turned out to be entirely paranoia. In the end, I managed to eat my breakfast without a problem. After the usual initial hesitation, the staff turned out to be friendly and helpful. The coffee may have tasted a little different to the stuff I’m used to, but that was probably just down to the beans they use. Thus, given it’s so close, it now looks like I have a new place for breakfast.

I just came across something pretty zarking awesome. I was watching Steve Shives’ latest video on how he prefers to play games on the easiest mode: to tell the truth I wasn’t that interested, but about halfway through he mentioned how, when he was growing up, one of his favourite games was Doom 2. That rang a bell, as it was a game me and my brothers used to play too (remember those deathmatches, guys?) But then came the cool part: he went on to say that he still plays Doom, and that you can now play it online on an internet game archive. Naturally that got me interested, and after a bit of googling I found This bit of epicness. The entire game, just as I remember it from my childhood, is there, to be played online for free! I instantly felt like I was twelve again.

(The only slight problem is, I now use sticky keys on my mac, which interferes with my need to press ‘control’ to shoot in the game, but I’m sure I can find a way around that…)

For those interested in the farce currently unfolding in America surrounding Donald Trump, I really think this is worth a watch. It’s an analysis of the way Trump speaks, and I think it’s very revealing. If you actually listen to his speeches at his rallies, press conferences or whatever, it soon becomes clear that Trump doesn’t talk like educated, eloquent politicians or businessmen usually do. Rather, he essentially spews streams of nonsensical word soup. Even his sentences lack the structure found in everyday conversation. Watching the video, it struck me that what was being described was someone with some kind of fairly severe neurological condition: I’m no expert, of course, but it put me in mind of people I’ve met with conditions like Autism. Autistic people sometimes struggle to find the words they need to express themselves; I’ve also heard them talk in loops and string random words together, just as trump seems to. I’m not saying he has Autism specifically, just that some kind of neurological condition may help to explain his bizarre behaviour.

Just for the record, I better note that I was up in Stratford again today, but instead of having to wait absolutely ages for a lift empty enough to get into, this afternoon one arrived just as I was rolling up to the doors. I was in, up and out within seconds! Rather than getting infuriated, the three or four people already in the lift cheerfully welcomed me in. It was kind of funny because weekends are usually when those two lifts are most crowded. To cap things off, as I rolled towards the Olympic Park I noticed the sun was starting to come out.

Things are obviously not all doom and gloom.

I have just watched a very, very interesting film indeed, although I must admit that, three hours ago, I’d never heard of it. After brunch today Dom suggested watching a film, which from the look of the sky struck me as a good idea. He went to my computer, loaded Disney+ and put on Free Guy. I was completely oblivious to it and didn’t have the foggiest idea what it was about.

Five or ten minutes into the film, I thought I was watching a very silly piece of crap indeed: it was set in a city, but it was exceedingly violent with people getting killed willy nilly. I just took it to be one of those puerile, gratuitous American action films I usually avoid. But then Dom pointed something out to me: this wasn’t supposed to be reality but a video game, and it suddenly became interesting.

The film is essentially an exploration of the relationship between the Real and Imaginary. What if a background character in a computer game could somehow become self-aware? What if something usually no more than a few pixels on a screen controlled by a few lines of code suddenly became aware of his own existence and the ultra-violent world around him? On one level, that notion is extremely silly, and the film does indeed have some very silly, contrived aspects; yet at the same time it raises some quite interesting philosophical questions, like how do we know we are real, and what is reality? If a character in a computer game became aware of their reality, what would they make of it? The film thus draws our attention to the unnecessary violence of modern video games as well as some of the bizarreness of video game culture. It also makes two or three extra-textual references which I liked.

When the end credits rolled I was intrigued. It’s only a 2021 film made for a streaming service, but it had given me a lot to think about. I would recommend checking it out if and when you can. After all, aren’t we all just characters in one giant role-playing game?

We have probably all been there: when you wake up too early, start thinking about stuff, and something starts to bug you. Yesterday afternoon I was mucking around on Facebook when I came across a video tour of the International Space Station. It was pretty cool as it showed you all kinds of cool stuff, following an astronaut as she floated gracefully around the station. What caught my attention most, though, was how the film lacked any sense of up or down. In usual films, we know that the ground will be at the bottom of the screen and the ceiling or sky will tend to be at the top. In the ISS video, however, the camera was able to roll and turn and we didn’t loose any sense of up or down because up and down don’t really exist in space. That struck me as cool.

Thinking about it in bed, though, something started to bug me. I remember, from GCSE Science over twenty years ago, that our sense of balance is controlled by a part of the ear: that in some piece of our ears we have some kind of liquid which keeps us steady. We feel dizzy when this ear-goo is disturbed. What is currently puzzling me is that, presumably, the goo depends on gravity pulling it downwards and keeping it level. In space there is no gravity, so can someone please explain why astronauts aren’t permanently dizzy? I hope I’m not being stupid here, but this really struck me as odd: why wasn’t the lady in the video, her hair floating like seaweed in the ocean, not constantly disorientated?

While it’s obviously all about vote-grabbing, I must admit that the announcements detailed here caught my attention. “Sadiq Khan has said that he would aim to bring WrestleMania, Superbowl and NBA to London and put together another winning bid for the Olympics in 2040. The Mayor of London – who is seeking re-election on May 2 – also announced today a ‘new boost’ into grassroots sport and underrepresented communities via City Hall’s £20 million Go! London fund.” While I’m not that fussed about wrestlemania or the superbowl, you know how excited I get about the Olympic Games. I see it as the world’s biggest sporting and cultural event; to see it held in London for a fourth time (my second) would surely be awesome. Mind you, in 2040 I’ll be 57, and there’s a very long time before then. That aside, it’s great to see that Kahn is eager to put London forward to host such events and to get this great city the attention it deserves.