a close shave

According to Chopper I need a haircut, and he offered to take my for one yesterday afternoon, but, given that Lyn wants me to let my hair grow, and that haircuts are practically my least favourite activity, I got out of it. However, Chopper said they also do very good shaves at the barbers in the village, which made me curious: is it possible for me, a guy with problems holding his head still, to have a traditional, barber-shop save?

So, images of blood gushing everywhere running through my head, off we went to the barbers. I guess the first surprise was that they agreed to do it in the first place. Chopper and I were welcomed in, and I rolled up to the mirror; then the fun began. I think yesterday afternoon saw the scariest few minutes of my life, especially when I saw the cut throat razor they were using. I concentrated as hard as I could on keeping my head still, but, of course, with cerebral palsy the more you try to keep still the more you move. I knew one false move could see that razor going through my artery, although it was expertly wielded by the shop manager. Pretty soon, we decided that the best thing was for chopper to hold my head still, but even then I was still bloody scared.

However, the results, I must say, were worth it. After the dangerous bit was over, they put aftershave on, and then a baking hot towel, like you sometimes see in things like Michael Palin programmes. I felt like a million pounds – I felt, in a way, like a man; the type of man who drinks martinis, and can tell the diference between a Vesper and a Gibson. My face felt smoother than ever, and still does this morning. Discussing it in the pub afterwards, I told chopper I think I’d definitely do it again: I never thought I could have a shave like that, but now I know I can, I’m definitely converted. I can’t help but wonder, though, whether that was the first time any guy with my kind of CP has had such a shave.

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